1. Make sure you own a nice bed.
2. Sleep in it frequently.
3. Remember how nice it feels to flip over your pillow to the cooler side.
4. Check your pulse and hum along to the rhythm because it is music.
5. Write clear and make a lot of spelling errors. Get the poison out and don’t worry about it being neat.
6. If you can, do not shut people out. You will have good days and they should see them.
7. If you feel overwhelmed, go outside and scream. Find a nice empty park in the middle of the night and scream as loud as you can until your throat is bleeding. The world wants to hear you.
8. Let yourself fall in love. Believe it or not, there are people out there who want your blacks and blues.
9. Keep waking up.
10. Keep waking up.
11. Keep waking up. Maybe with someone next to you.
It sucks when someone you have feelings for doesn’t share those feelings; it happens to women all the time, too. We hear “I just want to be friends” and “you’re like one of the guys” and “you’re like a sister to me” just as often. But you’ll never hear a woman complain that guys just don’t appreciate a Nice Girl because we’re taught it’s our own fucking fault when we’re rejected—we aren’t pretty enough or thin enough or sexy enough, we weren’t sexual enough or were too sexual, we put out too much or too little or too soon or not soon enough, we didn’t wear our hair the right way or our skirt the right length, we’re “too tomboyish” or “too butch” or “too feminine”, or we’re “not their type”, or we’re otherwise not good enough in various ways to entice the man to grace us with his affection.
But when we’re not interested in someone, we’re vilified. We’re the bitch that lead them on, the bitch who let them buy us dinner but didn’t want to date them, the bitch who doesn’t appreciate a nice guy, the bitch they were nice to and then got nothing in return from.
And, frankly, fuck those people. Showing interest in me, being friendly with me, getting close to me, or eating a meal with me (even if they paid for it) doesn’t obligate me to open my heart or my legs. And anyone who doesn’t appreciate my friendship sure as hell doesn’t deserve my love or my pussy.